I’m not one to promote my private life, however, there are times when a celebration is due and this is something to celebrate! Here’s goes…Drum roll please….I’m pregnant!
Wait there’s more….with twin boys!
Announcing my pregnancy online, I will be honest has been a source of anxiety. I am currently in the final trimester, so why did I wait so long? Well here’s why…
The Journey:
I wish I could write about a juicy story involving a bottle of red and a private pool in Bora Bora, however, my journey to this point was nothing of the sort. I know way more than the average person who pees on a stick and announces their pregnancy on social media 12 weeks later. I know too much. Like how much my babies weigh weekly, the exact date and time of conception, the size, and quality of each egg and sperm. Because that’s what it’s like going through infertility.
Yup, no smiley face pee sticks here. There are no surprises on this journey, so I wasn’t too surprised I was having twins at all. I knew it could always be a possibility in this process and my geriatric pregnancy. (No, there’s no assisted living for those who get pregnant later in life…if there was I would say it should have yoga classes, a Kate Spade dress closet, unlimited self-help books and awesome dance parties…oooh and mocktails with those glowing ice cubes!).
I have no shame in putting out there that I have been through 37 infertility cycles. Thirty freakin’ seven…it’s crazy to write that. Each of those months was full of pills, needles, and procedures. Additionally, there’s the heartache of losing 5 of the 7 pregnancies I’ve experienced over 8 years. Getting to this point has taken a lot of work and effort.
I talk a lot about work-life balance with my clients and occasionally I have a client who goes through a similar experience. Infertility is a part-time job. It’s an emotional mind-f*ck. It is time-consuming, physically draining, and soooo expensive. Your appointments are not convenient, they center all around when your test results say your body is ready, so if you are in an employment position that requires human contact, it can be quite difficult to navigate.
I’ve had to excuse myself during presentations and client meetings just to jam a needle in my butt or stomach, fun times. Last year I couldn’t have Christmas morning with my daughter because I had to get up at 5 am to drive 2hrs for a procedure and unfortunately, there were no Christmas miracles that morning.
This January was my last hurrah in infertility. If I didn’t get pregnant I was throwing in the towel and moving on. I was so positive my cycle failed that I didn’t pack any meds with me to go on a weekend family vacation to Disney. I was just about to treat myself to a nice cold glass of bubbly when my phone rang. It was my infertility nurse calling me to tell me I was pregnant! The rest is history now, that seems like forever ago as I feel Baby A and Baby B playing soccer in my stomach right now.
Infertility does not discriminate by your skin color, sex, education, or age. It affects many women and men who not only go through what I have experienced but also long roads to foster, adopt a child, or decide not to have children altogether. We need to not take our families for granted because, for some, the road to growing a family is a long one.
As you can tell, I’ve been through a lot and am more than passionate about this topic. Once I am on the other side of it, I plan to launch a segment of Life Design to help families navigate the infertility process emotionally in a way that will inspire and motivate.
So what does this pregnancy announcement mean for Life Design?
Future of Life Design:
Don’t worry! Life Design is not going anywhere. I plan to keep the Insights Blog going and take maternity leave during the final months of the year starting in late September (assuming these babies stay in there that long!). In mid-January, I will resume client appointments and speaking engagements (pending COVID status of course).
Next year, I have big plans for Life Design with a book coming out, a youtube channel, and courses. I am looking forward to expanding my Life Design family while also expanding my family at home. After all, we are about designing the lives we want and that’s exactly what I’m doing.
On a final note, this weekend, I encourage you to reach out to someone you know privately who has been through an infertility journey or is currently experiencing it. Let them know you may not understand what exactly they are going through, but you are here to listen. You know they are working hard with a ton of strength and resilience to make miracles happen.
Please pass this post to someone you know who is experiencing or has experienced infertility. I hope it can help them have hope in the times when it feels like there is none.
A little support goes a long way.
If you have experienced or are experiencing infertility, I would love to hear your story and how it has affected you. Please PM on social using the links at the top of this page or feel free to send snail mail to the address at the bottom of the page.
-Amy xo.
